I'll never forget my phone lighting up on 10-1-10 and the *duh-ding* of a text message coming through. It was something that happened quite often, but what followed was definitely one of the most powerful and invigorating moments in my life. Through the exchange of a few messages and the prompting of the Spirit, my life, and the life of a dear friend, were forever changed. Let me rewind a bit.
Over the month of September, I had been challenging myself to draw even closer to the Lord. I began seeking him on a different level and He began revealing himself to me in more luminous ways... sweeping my mind with revelation of even the most simplistic and trivial of things. I began reading the book Crazy Love by Francis Chan and was, once again, shaken to the core, the foundation, of my beliefs. After reading that book I felt as if I'd been sleeping and cold water had just been hurled upon me. I was now awake, undoubtedly so. During the few days of digging into the book, I watched as my prayers were so full of desperation, pleas and yearnings to be unquestionably used by Him. I realized that living radically was all I truly wanted, and the way I'd been living had been "bold"... yet nothing in comparison to what He desired for me. September 30th was the last day of the month. I remember praying that night and getting this word from Him. "I have great things in store.". Though there was no bright light, loud voice or gush of wind... I knew it was Him. That night I went to sleep content, refreshed and ready for those "great things" to come to pass.
October 1st was the day I finished reading Crazy Love (& if you've never read it I urge you to do so!). I began thinking about how I wanted to be a history maker and how I wanted to represent Christ to the best of my abilites. It's easy to have the enemy come in during those moments and place thoughts in your head such as "You'll never be good enough"... or "Who do you think you are? Do you not remember what all you've done?...All the mistake you've made? You'll never amount to anything." but 2nd Corinthians 5:17 says; "Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.". So, tell me, why would God throw past regrets in your face? He wouldn't/won't. I thought about how God promises to "... forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." –(part of 1 John 1:9) and realized the hesitation to be bold for Christ was a tool of the enemy trying to keep me from fulfilling the uniquely crafted plan and calling on my life. After coming to that realization, and for seeing the pathetic schemes of the enemy, I prayed that God would purify my heart and give me clean hands so that I would be able to do the will of God. I went about my day as usual when several hours later I received the three word text that perpetually changed me.
"I miss you!" was all Rachel Walker said and my natural response was "Aww, I miss you too!". We exchanged several basic "How are you doing?" texts but the conversation that was about to unfold was something I was completely unprepared for. When I asked her how she was doing she informed me that she had just been released from the hospital, where she had spent the 10 previous days. I asked her why and she simply told me that she was mentally unstable and a threat to her own life. When I questioned her more, she spoke of "becoming someone else" and "when she takes over". This only lead me to more questions and she willingly volunteered answers. She said the doctors diagnosed her with being Schizophrenic, Bipolar and suffering from Psychosis. Now, I've looked into different "illnesses" such as these and I firmly believe that since most scientists cannot comprehend the supernatural all they're doing by giving the "symptoms" a title are merely labeling demons. I will say, however, that it's only my opinion. When she stated her diagnosis something inside of me went off. I automatically knew that the diagnosis of a few doctors was NOT the diagnosis of who she was meant to be in the Lord. I was beginning to text her back informing her of this truth when the next thing I know I'm pressing 'send' to a message asking her to meet me somewhere that night so we could talk and pray. She replied saying she would love to meet me and that we could meet at the park in 20 minutes. I looked at the clock and we established that we'd meet each other there at 7:20pm.
As my mind was racing, at what felt like 150mph, I felt my heart pounding yet a calm sense of peace wash over me. Then the thought "This is one of those 'great things' times" dropped into my head. I then understood that God had been preparing me to face the battle I was about to walk into. I started praying and asking God to show me what I was supposed to talk to her about. I asked God to reveal to me the reason for me going and he then showed me that she truly needed to be saved. When I had that placed in my thoughts I was confused because Rachel had always been passionate about God and bold in her faith... or so I thought. I began questioning Him more, but I couldn't shake the sense that that was a major part of our meeting. God showed me that I needed to talk to her about her family(which I knew nothing about) and let her know that their mistakes didn't have to determine her future and who she would be.
While on my way to meet her the verse Matthew 17:20; "You don't have enough faith," Jesus told them. "I tell you the truth, if you had faith even as small as a mustard seed, you could say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there,' and it would move. Nothing would be impossible." started racing through my mind. I asked the Lord to go before me, soften her heart and keep all forms of distraction away. I prayed that I would be fearless, courageous and have faith... like a mustard seed.
When I pulled into the parking lot Rachel was sitting on a concrete bench. Her appearance wasn't "bad" but I remembered thinking that it was unlike her usual attire. On the average day, when I would see her out and about, she'd be dressed in the cutest little outfits that were the epitome of how an adorable young lady would dress (I remember because I used to always wish I had her clothes). However, the young lady that was before me was dressed in black leather leggings, a black and red tank top/shirt and a pair of red TOMS. Like I said, what she was wearing wasn't bad, I simply made a note in my head that something wasn't right.
Once I approached her we attempted to make small talk, but things seemed forced and uncomfortable. I didn't know what to do/say and it was obvious that she didn't either. We walked over to a table to talk. God told me that she needed to tell me everything she wanted to before I started, because I would be taking longer. I didn't question God on that, for if you know me well you must know that I'm an incredibly talkative person. She began telling me all about the hospital, what it was like, what all the doctors said, what she felt like, what she remembered. She went on and on.... I was in shock. The entire time I couldn't shake the feeling that something was severely wrong, but I couldn't put my finger on what it was....yet.
As she went on with her story she said "and then 'she' takes over. Yes. Another person takes over... and she wants to kill me. Sometimes, I can even look in the mirror and see a different person... she makes me dress differently too.". The moment those words escaped her lips I understood what I first thought at laying eyes on her in the beginning. Rachel was not dressing like her "normal self" on October 1st, but the "person inside" chose what she would wear. I've thought about that moment a lot and have wondered if the demon could tell that I knew... I'm not the best at being nonchalant. The minute she stopped talking and I began, the three people who had been at the park left. As the sun was setting and the day was coming to an end... great things were coming and a powerful battle was about to ensue.
Darkness began to creep upon us, so I innocently asked for us to move over to a concrete tunnel at the park where a light was positioned overhead. As I began talking I felt like God wanted me to speak to her about her family and salvation. At the time, I had no idea what her past had been like. I didn't know what all she had been through, I just knew what God was whispering to my heart. I started telling her that the decisions and mistakes of her parents did not determine who she was in Christ, that she did not have to live the same lifestyle, make the same mistakes and take the same paths. Before meeting her I had looked up several verses that I thought would be beneficial, marked them and had planned on reading them to her... God had something different in mind though.
While sitting there, I spoke to her about her family and about her salvation. When I asked her if she was saved she told me how she had gotten saved, as if she was a broken record...repeating herself multiple times. She changed the answer several times as well but at one point she desperately interrupted herself saying "I'm possessed by a demon!" then went back to telling me her salvation story, as if nothing had happened. I told her to rewind and that I agreed... but it was as if she had never said it...She was confused by my mentioning it and she told me I was crazy for thinking she could possibly be possessed. When I started talking to her about her family God told me to read Psalms 139:13 so I asked her if I could read her something. She was pleasant and kind and said "Of course!". I took my Bible out of my purse and began reading, as I was half-way finished with it I decided to look up and make sure she was connecting with what all I was saying... but what my eyes saw next astounded me more than words can explain.
Looking up, my eyes were no longer looking at my beautiful childhood friend but were staring straight at a demon. Rachel's face had elongated and her eyes were now black. Pitch black. She gazed at me with such a sheer hatred that I had never before felt. In that moment I wanted to run. I wanted nothing more than to get as far away as quickly as possible, but I knew that I had to stay. God had lead me to this moment in time to be His hands and feet... and when I said I would willingly do whatever He wanted, I meant it. Gathering every ounce of courage I possessed I looked away, back to the Bible, and finished reading the passage.
Once I concluded the reading, my heart was pounding so hard I felt it might burst from within. I looked up hoping she'd be back to normal, that possibly my eyes had just been playing tricks with me... but to no avail, she looked the same. I stumbled to form meaningful sentences that were applicable to the passage, but everything kept coming out wrong, that's when I asked her to pray with me. When I first asked her, she simply stared... with her black eyes and such a cold, evil demeanor. My initial question quickly turned into a demand and the next thing I know I'm saying "You know what? I'm not giving you a choice. We're praying. NOW.". My words seemed to be meaningless as she remained motionless, and emotionless. I told her to give me her hands, bow her head and close her eyes. She flipped her hands over but still glared at me. I had tried being nice for Rachel's sake but the realization that I was no longer dealing with her but with a demon hit hard and I felt as if it was trying to test me... just to see how serious I was. With a firm voice I leaned in closer fixating my eyes on its and I said "I told you to bow your head and close your eyes. We are praying to God on High, do it NOW!". As she started to bow her head, though her eyes were still on mine, I placed my hands upon her head forcing hers down and I started speaking in tongues, declaring and rebuking. The moment this happened she began screaming.
As she "sat" there screaming, yelling, cringing, convulsing and contorting I continued to pray. I continued to speak in tongues. I continued to rebuke. A while into it I felt like I needed to look her in the eyes so I could figure out if it was Rachel or the demon. I went to move her hair out of her face when I saw a smirk spread across her face.( Now, I don't know if any of you have seen the movie Passion of the Christ, but the part where the woman is holding the baby and the baby grins all evil like... that's the best way to describe what she looked like.) I moved the hair away from her eyes but she wouldn't look at me. She kept shrieking and then groaning and putting her hands in front of her eyes. Rachel later told me that "I couldn't look at you. I remember trying to open my eyes, but you were glowing. Your entire body was glowing and you were shining so bright! Like brighter than the sun... it was painful to look at you... I just couldn't..."
After about 45 minutes of praying. She sat up and I asked her how she felt. I asked her what she would do if she felt them coming back. She emotionlessly said "Pray..I guess..". At that every moments I saw her eyes switch from normal to black, then go back to normal. I demanded she pray, then she looked down and another voice screamed "No!"... That voice sounded like hers, but played through a voice changer. Another 45 minute time frame went by of praying, crying, screaming. She would come in and out of "being there" and when she was I had her pray against the attacks against her. At times she would be laying, almost lifeless it felt, in my arms yet I could feel things moving violently beneath her skin. Though those moments were uncomfortable, I held her close and rocked her.. I wanted her to know I wasn't going anywhere.
We went through three 45 minute "sessions" where we would be praying and she would be screaming. During the last "session"(for lack of a better term) I could feel something evil to the left of me... no sooner that I felt it did Rachel start screaming and pointing right where I felt the evil sensation. I told Rachel to pray to God and not acknowledge it. I sang several songs, including Amazing Grace, and finally felt a peace to leave. That moment was hard because I didn't know when it was "okay" to leave... so I prayed and God told me that my work was done.
The minute we were walking back to our cars a car pulled up, watched us for a while and then drove away. We later found out that those were some of Rachel's friends and that they were at another park and could hear us from where they were... but they told Rachel that they didn't think the screams and noises could have possibly been her because they were so unnatural sounding.
Rachel looked at her phone and had 13 missed calls(Think about the evil superstitions tied to that number.), later discovered all to have been from the same crazy ex-boyfriend.
On my way home that night I was amazed by God but shocked by what I had just witnessed. I went home and couldn't sleep. Not out of fear that things would lurk out of the shadows to eat me, or anything silly like that, but I was in complete shock. I got in bed, put on some praise&worship music, wrote and prayed.
While I was writing out the previous events, I got to the part that said "And so we met at 7:20" when my hand was redirected and swiped under the time. God told me to read the verse 7:20 in every book of the Bible that had one and he would then show me which ones applied to me and which one applied to her. 1st Corinthians 7:20; "Each person should remain in the situation they were in when God called them"- I felt this applied to me because I wanted to run... but I stayed. God blessed that. 2nd Samuel 7:20; "What more can David say to you? For you know your servant, O Sovereign LORD."- I felt this applied to me because I am God's servant and I was sent there to deal with giants... to deal with demons... to pull down strongholds. The story of David & Goliath was brought to my mind during Rachel and I praying... I prayed against the giants trying to stand in the way of her calling. The verse that applied to Rachel was this- John 7:20 "...You are possessed by a demon! Who is trying to kill you?". That one verse was yet another thing confirming everything.
I have so many other small details I could tell you, but I think I've covered the majority of the story. Rachel has since that night been truly saved, attending church and living a restored/ set free life! God has done so much in her, for her and through her! It's been a blessing to watch the entire situation unfold like it has. The path has not been easy, she must keep her guard up more than ever before and fill herself with good, Godly things.. that way the enemy can't come and try to dwell inside of her yet again... but she's doing a wonderful job. What a mighty warrior she is now.
When I told God I would go where He wants, when He wants to do what He wants.. to be perfectly honest, I wasn't expecting Him to call me to something like that. However, I am so thankful He did. I have since been so refreshed, awakened and alive. Through that experience I have grown so much. Life is not all about simply going to church because "It's what Christians do"... but it's about going to church, falling on your face before God and not caring that someone might think you're strange for crying, jumping, clapping, spinning.. or truly worshiping. Life is not all about simply trying to say no to sex, drugs, alcohol and parties... but it's about staying away from corrupt company who tries pushing you towards those things. Life is not all about simply smiling to someone's face then running their name through the mud the minute they walk away.. but dealing with your issues so you can love them and be a blessing to them. Life is not all about immediate satisfaction.. it's about spiritual endurance. Life is not all about getting away with doing the bare minimum for your spouse... it's about going above and beyond, putting their needs above your own. Life is not all about you... it's about God. I challenge you to try and do something every day that brings a smile to someones face! Do things that will push you outside of your comfort zone. Don't go out and be foolish, allow God to direct your steps.. but don't simply pray for good health, financial security and safety. Pray that God will use YOU in some way that will better the kingdom! My motto is "If I feel in control... then I am. If I feel I can handle things...then I can." I have to daily choose to "Let go and let God". Don't fall prey to the mentality that if you're doing good you're doing enough. Go out unto the world and be the shining light that we're called to be! But before you can do that, you must learn from the Son how to shine like the Sun. Don't become so consumed with doing things FOR God.. but learn the importance of doing things WITH God. We must first learn how to reflect Christ before we go out and proclaim in His name. Don't make a mockery of the one who gave you life. Seek Him, love Him and trust Him. I hope this has encouraged you and will be a catalyst in allowing God to freely move in your life, starting today! You will be amazed at how rewarding and fulfilling it is to be truly used of the Lord. God bless you all.
~Taylor~
1st Timothy 4:12 "Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity."
